The Art of Spiritual Surrender and Releasing Attachment to Outcomes

Surrendering is about forgetting what you think you need and embracing what you truly need

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I’m often asked about spiritual surrender. For some people it can feel completely disempowering. In my own experience and in the work I do with others, I’ve found it to be quite the opposite.

When it comes to spiritual surrender, the first step is to understand who or what you are surrendering. Some of us were born into a faith or spiritual practice that pre-established our identification of a Higher Power. Others, like myself, have separated from what we were taught as children (if taught anything at all), and are left to define our beliefs regarding a Higher Power, forced to curate our own brand of faith and spiritual practice.

As it relates to a Higher Power, know that this can mean different things for different people. What’s important is identifying what resonates with you, knowing that it may (and will most likely) change or evolve over time. If God resonates with you — great. For myself, it didn’t for a long time. Only recently have I started to become comfortable with this term. You may find that you are more comfortable using terms such as The Universe, Source, Spirit, Angels, Guides, or perhaps even Love. The semantics aren’t important, what’s important is your resonance to them.

Once you’ve identified a Higher Power of your own understanding, the idea of surrendering that which is holding you back or isn’t working isn’t about diminishing your own power or abilities; it’s about making you stronger.

The goal is to know that you don’t have to rely solely on your own power or strength because you have access to and the support of something greater than yourself.

It can be quite liberating to know that you don’t have to do it all on your own or have all the answers.

A Course in Miracles advises that the presence of fear is a sure sign that you are relying on your own strength. When we come to rely solely on our own strength and power, we limit ourselves from the opportunities or solutions that may lie beyond our field of vision or awareness. When we surrender to a strength and power of something greater than ourselves, our fear dissolves as we make room for a new host of possibilities and opportunities. We acknowledge that there may be a plan that far exceeds our own vision or understanding of our present circumstance or life. Of course, this doesn’t absolve us of responsibility or the need to take action, but it does open the door for divine guidance so that we can take the next right action.

So how do we surrender?

A Course in Miracles says prayer is the medium for miracles. What greater miracles can be achieved than a change in perception that dissolves our fears and blocks? The art of surrendering is about forgetting what you think you need. It’s about releasing the need to control the outcome or the terms in which the solution in manifested. Instead, look for divine guidance and seek what will be of the highest good for all. The solution may be wildly different from what we’ve envisioned and may surpass what we believed or thought possible.

Surrendering — becoming unattached to the outcome — creates space for creative solutions.

A Course in Miracles says the solution to the problem is made available to us the moment the problem arises. The shift lies in our willingness to see through the lens of love as opposed to the lens of fear.

The terms of your surrender are your own. You may need to surrender thoughts of self-attack or judgment, or perhaps you need to surrender a particular situation or relationship. Try asking that your perception be transformed so that you can look at it through new eyes, and perhaps even see clearly for the first time.Perhaps your surrender lies in releasing control, trusting that regardless of the outcome or solution, you will be ok. Try trusting in something greater than yourself, a plan larger than your own, and allowing guidance to move through you and direct you to where you are to be lead.

What keeps us stuck is often our attachment — to an ideal, a plan, a life, or a relationship that we are trying to push and fit into a specific mold. But you can choose to surrender and allow reality to take on a shape of its own design.

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You may also enjoy reading Time to Toss Your Principles? Discern when Your Principles are Serving You or Not, by David James Di Pardo