Radical self-acceptance is based on claiming and nurturing your true strengths, which builds confidence and allows you to thrive in the workplace.
When I played tennis professionally, I saw firsthand the importance of confidence. Each day, I competed against some of the world’s top talent, but the fact was that almost everyone was playing at a similar level. Sure, a handful of players were set apart — in a league of their own. But the rest? It was all a confidence game.
Confidence makes all the difference in every area of life.
You win when you know how to effectively increase your confidence. Although the answers lie within yourself, your internal confidence will produce external elevation. So how do you increase your confidence in the workplace?
1. The Choice: Be Yourself
Do you know who you are? Are you tapping into one of the greatest currencies in life: self-awareness?
Being at ease with yourself is the first step to being truly confident.
Think about it. The best athletes get into flow state when they are able to sink into themselves, not when they feel a tremendous amount of pressure. The most likeable people you know are so relaxed that no one cares whether or not they perform perfectly. They are responding out of who they are, not reacting to pressure from the outside.
In the work environment, it’s easy to forget who you are because of all the external pressures. But you have a chance to cut off that unhealthy pattern for good, to go beyond mental production to feeling what is real.
Let’s make this super practical. Next time you arrive at your workplace, take five minutes to sink into your breath. Scan your body and stay with what you feel. This will keep you from the temptation of getting outside yourself and trying to prove your value.
Instead, as you breathe, you will feel what is true and make the conscious decision to be yourself.
Now that you feel connected, you’re ready to do your best work.
2. The Shift: Only Do What You’re Great At
Are you a fish trying to climb a tree? It’s a ridiculous picture, right? And yet, in the workplace, so many ‘fish’ think they have to struggle up that tree.
To do your best work with confidence, you need to be sure that what you’re doing is in alignment with who you are.
If you’re a fish, you need to be swimming, not climbing. It’s as simple as that.
So, how do you make this shift? First, we have to understand that we train people around us how to see us and treat us. When you proactively focus on and pursue what you’re great at, others will see who you are and respond.
At first, you will experience some tension because you’re changing the game. You’re saying no when you used to say yes. This brings up a lot of new feelings — for you and for everyone else. But soon enough, you’ll find that others are only asking you to do fish things.
You’ll find that you have more energy than ever before. You’ll find that you’re no longer struggling.
Instead, you’re placing the most value on what comes the easiest. When you are primarily doing what you are good at doing your confidence will skyrocket.
3. The Commitment: Hone Your Craft
Once you’re only doing what you’re really great at the majority of the time, it’s time to put the pedal down and become an absolute expert. Now that you’ve committed to you, you have the space to do the work.
All that extra time you once spent handling all the minutiae you can now spend honing your craft.
Keep in mind that this step should not feel painful. Lady Gaga has to train and hone her craft, but she takes joy in the process and as a result, she experiences a great reward. When she steps into the studio to practice, she comes alive. When she steps onto the stage, she captivates thousands.
What is your studio? What is your stage? There you’ll find joy, and there you’ll find your reward.
Are you ready to feel true confidence in the workplace? Then it’s time to stop struggling and fighting your way to the top. It’s time for radical self-acceptance. Will there be tension as you change the game? Yes. Does this process work? Absolutely. But now you’re ready for exponential results.
You may also enjoy reading The Importance of Intention to Create Freedom and Aliveness by Carter Miles