Heeding our intuition vs. our ego frees us to experience joyful spontaneity — and vice versa
Spontaneity: carefree freedom from constraint
synonym: abandon, ease, light heartedness, naturalness, unconstraint, uninhibitedness.
I did something spontaneously this morning.
I noticed that I did something spontaneously this morning.
Both are significant to me.
Spontaneity is a result of a part of my daily practice of listening to my intuition. Although I began this practice of listening and feeling the signs and cues of my inner innate wisdom — my intuition — quite a while ago, it has taken me some time to integrate spontaneity, on both the unconscious and conscious levels. One of the pearls, the joys of this practice, was revealed to me in the form of spontaneity: a new freedom from planning, expectations and control!
Today I woke up without a plan. I found a number of issues I had to deal with and I did. I looked up at the clock and saw that I could make it to a yoga class easily if I wanted to. I checked in with myintuition and asked myself what I wanted to do? Staying home made me feel uneasy and edgy; going out felt like an opening, a sense of relief. I had checked in, I was conscious and aware and felt my answer. It was a clear YES! Such a simple thing, such a small decision.
It’s the small things, the little decisions we make all day long, that flex that muscle called intuition.
The more we flex, the more we feel, the more we come alive and are aware of all the choices we have available to us every day that can make us feel good, or sometimes bad.
I believe there really are no wrong/bad decisions; I just have to live with the consequences of my choices. The consequences help me to see and feel the results of how I make my decisions, toning those intuitive muscles. If I slip at times and find myself judging myself and/or others for those choices and end up feeling guilty, annoyed, impatient, or any of those self-defeating emotions we humans have, I just pick myself up again and say: “better next time”.
Interestingly, the Sanskrit word for ‘spontaneity’ is SvaBhAva, which also means ‘native place’ or ‘being in the Self’. Spontaneity in Sanskrit connects the ‘action’ with the ‘being’. Our native place is where our Self resides. Being in our ‘native place’, being in our ‘highest Self’ creates the opportunity for spontaneity.
When I feel spontaneous, I feel free.
I release all barriers that keep me from seizing that moment. This very precious moment is all that I have. All the plans and goals and reasons that might exist become secondary, background noise that I won’t allow to keep me from experiencing this very moment.
Internal noise comes in so many forms to distract, confuse and undermine us. Most of the time the source of this noise is our ego, doing it’s best to keep the status quo, keep us under control — no surprises, no spontaneity. Why does it do this? Why do we allow ourselves to be directed and controlled by our ego in this way?
The ego is very Self-protective. Often it is because our social and cultural conditioning has us think that the ego has our best interests at heart. Yet it doesn’t want us to know, nor be guided by, our higher Self. While the ego is where our self-esteem, self-importance, self-worth, self-respect, self-image, self-confidence are supposed to live, I would venture to say that these qualities are mostly experienced negatively through the ego. To positively experience these aspects of ourselves, we need to feel them through our higher Self.
For most of us, we aren’t even aware that we are being driven by ego.
When the ego talks we simply drop everything and pay attention. We’re confused about what/who the ego is. On one hand, we are told that to focus attention on the ego is being egotistical and self-centered; we’re not supposed to be ‘ego aware’ or give ourselves too much attention. On the other hand, the ego is talking to us all the time with a little voice that is judging, comparing, criticizing, making us feel in a constant state of never good and not enough.
The ego doesn’t usually focus on rewards. In order to shift from ego-driven decision making to higher Self choices, try consciously feeling your way into your decisions, connecting to your intuition wherever it shows up for you — whether it’s the heart, the stomach, the head. Notice what you feel when you have choices to make. Make the choice that makes you feel good and know that you are being intuitive.
Of course, there are times when we have a responsibility to show up that might not make us feel great. (There are ways to improve that too, but that’s another practice.) To be able to discern the different types of choices that are presented to us, begin with small, easy choices. It doesn’t always have to make sense and who knows where it might lead.
When was the last time you took a moment to give yourself a pat on the back for a job well done? Go ahead — give yourself that pat on the back and reward yourself for every little victory of awareness you have as you connect to your intuition. Surprise yourself. Throw caution to the wind. Free yourself from the same old patterns created by a controlling ego and explore your inner innate wisdom and the world of spontaneity.
You may also enjoy reading How to Understand and Prioritize Your Self Care, by Indira Abbey Heijnen