A Dialog with Lakshmi: The Goddess of Abundance

Estimated reading time: 5 minutes

I’m no Goddess…but a curious gift from a friend provokes me daily to see the myriad forms of abundance I have in my life, and to continually reach higher

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I was recently gifted a small brass statue of the goddess Lakshmi. I am sure many of you have seen her before. She is a woman with four arms sitting in lotus style who appears in many Indian prints, pictures, and images. As a thank you for a successful collaboration, the friend who gave me the gift introduced her as the goddess of wealth, prosperity, and success. He said, “She reminds me so much of you.” Was he saying I was goddess-like? I flippantly asked if I was given a goddess with many hands because I am so good at juggling multiple projects. He smiled, I smiled, and we ended the conversation.

I took her home and read as much as possible to figure out why this person chose this particular gift for me. I learned that many refer to her as the goddess of abundance. Yet, when I think of abundance, I see those that have so much it is overflowing. It’s a term saved for the uber-wealthy or super-successful. I am neither of those.

So now she sits on my windowsill in the kitchen, watching me, tempting me to see and understand her purpose. I can feel her presence while I’m making dinner or just simply stopping in the middle of the day to pause and have a cup of tea. She tells me I need to stop, reflect, and seek answers to the questions I didn’t even know I needed to ask.

The internal monologue started something like this:

I have not changed the world, brought about peace, or saved a life. I do sometimes have the mouth of a sailor, leave my house unfit for human viewing, laugh at inappropriate times, and unintentionally hurt people’s feelings. A Goddess I am not.

Being given a goddess and potentially being compared to her is daunting.

I had a therapist once tell me to stay out of my head at all costs because my brain is a bad neighborhood and can only lead to a dangerous path — and she was right. The second I opened up to all the positive things I have been a part of, the negative thoughts and self-talk started rumbling in my brain.

Why do we default to “I am not enough?”

I am sure we can trace these negative emotions back to that one time when you reached for something and fell short. That one instance has pushed its way into the center of your brain and serves as a constant reminder that you failed. But what about all the times you succeeded or even thrived? I read that you remember negative experiences more vividly than positive ones, so maybe that is why they rear their ugly heads each time you are pushed out of your comfort zone. They remind you to keep your ego in check and serve as a grounding when you get too bold.

But we need to stop and remind ourselves that we are not the sum of our failures; we are the sum of the lessons we learned from our successes and failures.

Getting to this place in my life has taken me a long time (and lots of self-love). Although, like many, I am often very hard on myself, and I am more likely to criticize my behavior than reward it, I am not afraid to cheer myself on when I am feeling blue or to give it a “You go, girl” when I reach a goal. Maybe this is a place where Lakshmi and I can coexist.

But there is still the issue of abundance and its role in me.

Success and wealth went hand in hand when I was young and naive. Let’s face it; we would look at someone’s average salary and decide whether they could be deemed successful. I just don’t think that is the success that Lakshmi is speaking of.

Every day, as a teacher, I get to see the magic of understanding in students’ eyes. I get to watch as I guide young people to seek their best selves and celebrate when they achieve their goals. I get to see my children becoming incredible adults with passion and compassion for others. Many of my successes cannot be viewed through monetary value. A paycheck can measure none of that; yet for some, they can only see their bank balance as a success. What about their life balance?

Perhaps my goddess and I do have something in common.

I do have a wealth of love that surrounds me. My “people” love me for the unfiltered version of me that I only show to those near and dear. Even when I spew the truth, though sometimes hard to take, they return and ask for more. I often hear how refreshing it is to be around someone unafraid to speak her mind and rock the boat. My boat is always rocking.

I have recently taken to responding to the question of what I do with the statement, “I try to make people happy.” You can imagine the strange looks I get. But in reality, all the jobs I do, whether teaching, counseling, or writing, serve the same goal. Finally, instead of seeing multiple hands for multiple tasks as a burden, I can see it as a way to touch more people. I hope that my words and help will make someone else’s life a bit better. Is this the abundance that I share?

My gift-giver may not have been so wrong in bestowing on me the first of the goddess, Lakshmi. My mistake was applying too literal or material a definition to the concept of abundance. My family often teases me and calls me “Princess.” I was the youngest of three girls and maybe a little bit spoiled growing up. But I think I will change that, and from now on I will ask that they refer to me as “Goddess.” If it is good enough for Lakshmi, it is good enough for me.

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You may also enjoy reading Pillow Talk: A Nod to Our Stalwart Companions, by Judy Marano.