The pandemic put all of our lives into chaos; now it’s time to realign with what you want and need. It’s time to be a little selfish
Many of us will have put together a list of New Year’s resolutions at the start of 2021. But whether you want to sign up to the gym or start saving up some money, even with the best of intentions, most of our resolutions will fall by the wayside in a couple of months’ time. One thing you should be thinking about this year, though, is how to start prioritizing yourself.
Let’s take a look at why you need to be more selfish in 2021 and where to start, including:
- Focusing on your own goals
- Treating yourself well
- Learning to say no
2020 was a challenging year for everyone. With quarantine and lockdown measures, we’ve all been forced to adjust to a slower pace — working remotely, spending more time at home, and trying to find our way through the pandemic.
Many of us have reassessed our priorities and the way we’re living. We’ve realized you don’t need to say yes to everything, be consistently busy and stressed out. You can’t and don’t have to be there for everyone all the time — and it’s important to be aware of that.
You shouldn’t put other’s well-being over your own, and it’s okay to focus on your own ambitions ahead of supporting others.
It’s become more important than ever to set clear boundaries that help you to look after yourself. Taking time for yourself to look after your own physical and mental health has become a priority. And creating a clear distinction between your working day and personal life has been essential while working from home so that we don’t burnout.
In 2021, it’s important to focus on this self-awareness of what you do and don’t need in your life and keep prioritizing yourself.
How You Can Be More Selfish in 2021
On that note, here are four ways you can be more selfish in your life this year:
Focus On Your Own Goals
Outline the goals that you want to work towards, whether they’re personal or professional, and come up with a plan for how you’re going to achieve them. Consider where you want to be in a year’s time, and the steps you need to take during 2021 to get there.
That might mean setting aside a certain amount of time each week to work on your side business or signing up to a course to learn something new.
Your goal could be as simple as starting a new hobby that you’ve been putting off or getting back into shape. Whatever it is, make sure it’s something reasonable that you can stick to, and don’t let it get pushed to the side.
Treat Yourself Well
Take some time for yourself and learn how to practice self-care. If you’re not sure where to start then take some advice from an expert like Orion Talmay, a love and wellness coach. Orion says: it’s not selfish to love yourself — and that’s all you’re really doing by prioritizing your wellbeing and focusing on what you need.
Start by making sure you’re looking after your physical and mental health.
Try to eat a balanced diet, cut down on snacks and take out, and make time to cook more meals from scratch.
Get into the habit of exercising regularly and you’ll see a boost in your mood and motivation. If you struggle to stick with exercising, fitness coach Julie Lohre says: you need to figure out your fitness motivation if you want to make serious changes to your health. So focus on your long term goals, and how improving your overall wellbeing is going to help you to achieve them.
Learn to Say No
Sometimes it can feel impossible to say no to someone — whether it’s because you worry you’re letting them down or you feel like you might be missing out on something. But it’s important to recognize when you can’t or don’t want to do something and learn to say no.
Not doing everything all the time will give you more space to look after yourself, and it will allow you to be more focused and present for the things that you do actually want to do.
Stop worrying about other peoples’ opinions
A lot of the time this is easier said than done, but it’s an important part of prioritizing your own wellbeing. When you start focusing on yourself and saying no to others it might take a while for people to adjust but it’s important to focus on what you need to do. Especially if they’re used to you agreeing all the time.
Try not to worry about what other people are thinking about you and your decision to focus on your goals. Ultimately your friends and family are going to want what’s best for you and for you to be happy — so in the long term, they should support your decision to be more selfish.
Learning to be more selfish takes practice but in the long run, it’s an important part of looking after yourself. You need to establish boundaries and know when to put your own needs first. It’ll help you to focus on and achieve your own goals, and you’ll be more positive and motivated.
You may also enjoy reading Boundaries, Boundaries, and More Boundaries: The Key To Managing Energy Vampires by Christiane Northrup, M.D.