Estimated reading time: 8 minutes
Our mind can help us gain control over our world, but it can also direct the way we think and behave without our guidance
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We all talk to ourselves. Our “inner speech, or self-talk, is where our thoughts are not expressed externally, and communication is limited to our own personal innerdialogue.” Internal language can not only express what you have experienced but also direct the events of your life. Sometimes, we purposely generate this internal dialogue. Something is on our mind, and we begin to express it internally. We know what we are saying and direct the course of that conversation. However, at other times, we may not be as in control of that internal conversation as we would like. Sometimes, the conversation begins without any application of conscious thought on our part. When this happens, we can lose control of what we are thinking, and how it affects the course of our lives. Call this internal verbal autopilot.
With the reduction in conscious thought during internal verbal autopilot, our self-talk seems to dictate its own course. Sometimes, suddenly, we are in the midst of a full-blown internal conversation, and we don’t remember how it started. Also, attempts to stop the conversation are not always successful. We return to the discourse despite repeated attempts to stop it. Learning is a function of repetition over time. The repetition does not have to be consciously applied. Sometimes, learning occurs with an unconscious application of thought. So, if we spend significant time allowing our internal dialogue to run on autopilot, our brain will learn to adjust to the process. We will have less control over what we are thinking, and may find ourselves falling into a negative linguistic internal conversation.
Under conditions of unchecked internal verbal autopilot, two things happen:
1. The brain learns to begin conversations without applying conscious thought.
2. Internal verbal themes develop, which can become a routine way of thinking.
Internal communication can have a powerful effect on how we act.
Without understanding what is happening, as we repeatedly engage in internal conversations, we are preparing ourselves for our future actions. Since we are not controlling the internal dialogue, what we say to ourselves significantly influences our thoughts and actions. We can become a slave to the tone it has set, particularly when it is a recurring dialogue. When this happens, we may carry out actions dictated by our internal dialogue, feeling like those actions must be performed without understanding that our internal dialogue instigated the action.
This need to perform occurs because our minds focus on what the internal dialogue tells us. It sets the stage for the action to eventually be performed. Here is a broad example: Something happens in your life. You don’t get closure about the incident, and you can’t seem to take your mind off it. This instigates a continued internal conversation about the incident. You become emotional, and since there is no closure on the matter, the internal conversation continues, often escalating, as do your emotions. When this happens, the need to act increases. Thus, you have become a slave to your internal conversations.
Recurring internal dialogues can happen when we are not applying conscious energy to what we are thinking and our minds run on autopilot. Suppose such reoccurring dialogue is the product of anger at a person or situation that has negative energy attached to it. This energy can set the tone for how our minds think, and since the dialogue becomes repetitive, the brain learns to think using angry thoughts. Our brain learns to think according to the way it has been taught. So if we think positive thoughts, it will learn to think positively. However, we will learn to think negatively if we think with negative thoughts.
Our internal persona — the set of qualities, beliefs, personality traits, and/or expressions that define who we are — solidifies as a result of repeated linguistic themes. Internal linguistic themes have two characteristics:
• They are either positive or negative.
• Reoccurring themes solidify as continued attention is applied to them.
Recurring internal linguistic themes play an important role in establishing our internal persona. Sometimes, it may be the same unresolved conflict that continues to present itself. Other times, it may be a different event, but we begin to use the same internal language to address it.
When the brain’s teacher is conscious energy — that is, when we are in control of our internal dialogue — our brain is being directed to think and learn in deliberate fashion. We are conscious of what we are thinking, and we can decide to be more positive. So, making a conscious effort to engage in positive self-talk, working with the facts, and arriving at solutions, teaches our brains to engage in dialogues infused with positive energy, which can lead us to productive solutions and also help us to be happier and healthier.
The second way the brain learns is through passive sources. This is when the brain is receiving recurring autopilot themes instead of receiving enough conscious energetic input. If the themes are positive, they will work to our advantage. However, if they are negative — i.e., angry, annoyed, and steeped in conflict, our internal dialogue will reflect this negativity.
If negativity is the recurring internal dialogue theme, the brain will learn to think in that fashion, and the dialogue will reflect this in a cyclical way. Also, those passive sources often become internal autopilot language. Since it is not conscious, it is more difficult to control. Whether the brain is receiving conscious information or is defaulting to autopilot thinking, it is being trained or learning to use internal conversations that are consistent with the training program. In this way, much of our life will be defined by how we speak to ourselves.
The Seven Keys to Positive Linguistic Learning
1. Apply conscious thought to your internal dialogue routinely.
2. Infuse your conversation with positive words and phrases.
3. Stop negative conversations before they develop into themes.
4. Always look for solutions to reoccurring situations.
5. Have a plan to divert your mind away from negative reoccurring conversations.
6. Keep your body as calm as you can. The body and the mind work synergistically, so a relaxed body aids in producing positive linguistic energy.
7. Talk to others about what you were thinking, take the conversation out of your mind
Keeping your internal conversations positive is a simple action step.
Use positive language as often as you can. This will require some conscious effort. However, the more conscious energy you apply to your internal conversations, the more control you can gain over them. Everyone has negative internal conversations at times. You won’t train your brain to be negative just because a single negative internal conversation begins. It’s allowing the conversation to develop that creates the training program. So stop the conversation as soon as you recognize it has become negative. Then, ask yourself what you need to do to address the issue at hand efficiently. If you need help, ask for it. Remember, many negative conversations begin because of issues that don’t have closure or problems that don’t seem to have solutions.
If you catch yourself engaging in negative conversations, identify some tasks, hobbies, or other ways of diverting your attention from those thoughts. Doing so will help you interrupt an internal negative training program. When you do, try to substitute some positive energy in its place.
Keeping your body calm is extremely important to assist your mind in productive thinking. Anxiety, anger, and conflict all register in the body. It is difficult to speak to yourself positively when your body is holding on to negative energy. If you’re having a difficult time with a positive training program, talk to others about it. Get it out of your head. They might be able to help you, and if you can’t stop the negative thoughts, there is no shame in asking for professional help.
Action Steps to Help You Control Your Internal Language
1. Always apply as much conscious energy to your conversations as possible.
2. Strive for positive language as much as possible in your internal conversations.
3. Always look for solutions to any situation causing internal conflict.
4. Keep your body calm. Focus on slowing your breathing, and consider using meditation, prayer, and/or other calming methods.
5. If you’re having problems turning off our mind, make an appointment with your primary care physician to determine if anything physical may be contributing to your difficulties.
6. If you are still having trouble shutting off your mind, consider contacting a psychologist or a counselor who can help you through any underlying concerns.
Your brain will continue to learn as long as you are alive and healthy. It will learn best when you supply it with conscious thoughts and direct its learning program, but it will also learn when you are unaware of the information it is receiving. The most important takeaway is to understand that your brain will learn to respond to the world from the type of program it is experiencing. Conscious positive internal communication is the key to providing a positive training program for your brain and turning internal conversations into productive dialogues. Keep your internal language conscious, and take control of your life.
You may also enjoy reading The Power Inside You: 10 Secrets to Self-Empowerment, by Faust Ruggiero.
