Learn to discern when something is true and right for you versus when it is not… You’ve got to feel it out
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Imagine for a second that you could choose anything — to create any life you desired — what would you choose? Not what you think you should choose, or what you parents or family tell you to choose, but truly what would make you happy. Something that is true for you.
In my own life, and with the clients I see in the Access Consciousness classes I facilitate, the most challenging task I have found is knowing and acknowledging what is actually true for you. The only thing more challenging than finding out what is true for you is actually acting on it. What an odd world we live in where one of the most challenging things is to be that which we already are.
Here are some tools to help you uncover and choose what is true for you:
Light and Heavy
Have you ever known something wasn’t going to work out, but you tried to convince yourself it was? How did that work out for you? It is the same thing with light and heavy.
You just know. If it is light, it’s true for you. If it’s heavy, it is not.
If something is true for you, it will create lightness in your body and your being. When something is light, there is a sense of space, expansion, and possibility. When something is heavy, however, there is a sense of finality, contraction, and a lack of possibilities. You feel stuck. But you can only ever be stuck with a lie; what is true for you never sticks to you, it just is.
When you have an ah-ha moment or when you suddenly have awareness about something that you weren’t clear about previously, you relax into it. That is the lightness. When you have these moments, your body feels more alive, more present. You have a sense of space that did not exist before.
It is not about believing. Whatever you do, don’t believe anything anyone says to you, including what you tell yourself. You have to know whether it is true for you. You are the only one who can live your life and also the only one who has to live your life. If you are not making choices that work for you, consider making different choices.
What is true for you may or may not be true for others. And what’s true for others may or may not be true for you.
For every choice you make, get a sense of whether it has a lightness or heaviness for you. Then start choosing the ones that have a sense of lightness. The more you choose lightness, the more space and possibility will show up in your life because each choice you make helps you create a future with more and more lightness.
Get Uncomfortable
In the Right Voice for You classes, one of the tools we use is to put clients on a stage. They can sing. They can dance. They can just stand there. The activity is not important. The point of it is for them to see what comes up for them, to get them out of their comfort zones, and to just be in front of people. Your comfort zone is what is familiar and safe for you; it is not what is true for you. Instead, it is the heaviness you have learned to live with. It is everything that you think you should be or do.
Change occurs outside your comfort zone; you cannot stay in your comfort zone and change at the same time.
Another objective is to get them to stand on the stage with their uncomfortableness. So often we run away from that sense of uncomfortableness, but the trick is to stay with it because on the others side of the uncomfortableness is more space, more freedom, and more of you. The uncomfortableness is not a wrongness, it is you breaking out of the lies and heaviness you bought as real, even though it was never true for you.
It is the same in your life.
When you are choosing what is true for you it may be uncomfortable, but just know that the uncomfortableness is an indication you are changing. Enjoy it. What I see occur from being on stage is that the clients realize they don’t need to conform to their own or others’ perceptions, definitions, or labels of ‘who they are’. They can change from minute to minute and the uncomfortableness fades. They realize the uncomfortableness cannot stop them and each time of getting on stage and experience being uncomfortable, it gets easier. The experience becomes less uncomfortable and more enjoyable.
The same goes with choosing what is true for you. If you keep choosing it, it becomes easier and more enjoyable. So, what is true for you? Are you willing to choose it?
You may also enjoy reading Three Breaths: Connecting to The Holy Fire of Truth Within by Meggan Watterson